Am I lazy?

Students are the epitome of lazy, apparently. The stereotype suggests that we don’t surface from our smelly rooms until midday. We spend what’s left of the day dressed in hoodies, dragging ourselves to class. We then cram in our studying during the early hours of the morning, accompanied by a ready meal and a beer. Well, no, actually.

I’m a morning person, which is a good thing for a student. I like to be at my desk by 9am, notebooks ready and waiting. When you only have nine hours of face-to-face teaching a week, you have to make the most of the rest of the time available. University is all about self-motivation and self-study. If I’m not in the library gathering research books, then I’m reading them with a cup of tea. Or I might be reading fiction, learning what makes them work so I can reflect this in my own writing. I do an awful lot of writing, from plans to essays to timelines to the actual stories themselves. Although creating stories can be time-consuming, I normally find that the time flies by.

Not today though. Today, I have reached for the hoody. All I can think about is getting into pyjamas and watching films. I am burying my head in the sand with regards to upcoming deadlines and progress for my stories. Even my characters seem to be ignoring me today, no one wants to come and play on the page. There is no spark in sight. I feel like hiding under a blanket and forgetting that my responsibilities exist.

Does this make me lazy? You do indeed have to push yourself to get things done, but I would argue it is acceptable to give yourself a break every so often. I’m awful with anxiety about getting things done and completing tasks correctly. When I spend so long with my work during the week, sometimes I do want my weekends to be story-free. I don’t think that’s laziness. I think that’s me attempting to find harmony and a work/life balance. I will only have myself to blame if the balance is off kilter and my life is affected. I can accept responsibility for my own choices, whatever the outcome might be.

(Budget challenge update: A little expenditure today, but nothing too overwhelming. £3.35 for train ticket, 85p on flapjack and £1.50 for bus far = £5.70. So, £48.30 to last 21 days.)


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